Name that Tight Sag

S a t u r d a y , A u g u s t 2, 2 0 0 8

In case you've been hiding under a Bose noise canceling rock for the past seven months, 2008 is the official year of hipster douchebag rap. Yeah, they went up on it, bought it and wrapped 2008 in Louie Murakamiflauge -- so don't act like they didn't.
We all know the holy trinity: Kanye, Lupe and Pharrell. So, we're gonna focus on some of the burgeoning names in hipster douchebag rap today.

Kidz in the Hall

They are not driving-- they are hang gliding.

Kidz in the hall (or Kidz as the...kids(?) call them?) burst onto the scene with their single "Driving Down the Block." I admit it, I liked it, so I bought the album. The album, which features two good songs (Driving down the block AND Driving Down the Block (REMIX)), reminded me of another lackluster album, in the sense that it sucked, by a recent born-again hipster.
But there was one redeeming quality about it: The album featured a guest appearance on almost EVERY track, thus by cutting down on the total time they were rapping (I take it the executive producer has been around the block a time or two--ZING!). They split nineteen guest appearances among fourteen songs. With those kind of numbers it was a safety orange case and a Mr. Serv-on spot away from being a No Limit album. Oh the possibilities...

The Cool Kids

The Cool Kids, seen above performing streetwear's preferred method of coitus (using a plastic mannequin with quickstrikes on), paved their way into the hipster douchebag set by selling 4,300 copies of their album the first week (which I think is pretty good, since I'm assuming their album is awful). I haven't listened to any of their tracks, other than the Driving down the Block remix (Where they manage to get out shined by everybody on the track--always a tough feat when Kidz in the Hall is involved...) and the Rhapsody commercial that has mercifully left syndication, but I still feel OK in saying that they have arrived as hipsterati.

Tyga

Tyga, right, out hipster douchebagging a quality opponent.

Tatted like a Yakuza member this guys a little different than the others. No he doesn't have street cred (he was chain jacked by Spider Loc and 40 Glocc) and no, he didn't make his way into the music biz on his own (see his "Music" video), but his skeletal frame does make white girls quiver.

Wale

Enough coke has been used in the making of this picture to make any of these rappers tolerable.

Wale might not have full blown HDR, but he manages to keep a good balance between not being a hipster douchebag and being a HUGE hipster douchebag. He raps about Nikes, selvedge and will remix any thing, any time, any place.

--Ira